soy salsacita

the day after jesus ascended into heaven, our fridge decided to ascend, too. in temperature, that is. it became a hot-house for cheese, a saucy sauna, a very loud, tall freezer.

not a travesty. it was purchased for 40 bucks by our housemate dan 3 years ago and has seen its fare share o' livin' since then. a share-house hopper ice box, and now it was an ice box in the literal sense as i filled each shelf with make-shift ice trays (slabs of ice in tupperware containers) in order to preserve the preserves... and 7 jars of mango chutney.

7 jars? just kidding. one of the first things I did when I moved in was to consolidate the - yes - 7 jars of mango chutney into 2.5 jars, 0.5 of which has been used since so now we are perilously teetering on the brink of a mere 2. (don't hold your breath! if the temperature keeps climbing in there, those 2 jars might just get hit with spring fever and we could have 15 more jarricitos on the way...)

all the "very perishables" (most things that say "please refrigerate me" don't actually need to be refrigerated. example? mustard.) were living in a giant orange eski (ozzi for cooler) in the shape of homer simpson's prized "duff beer" - a present dan's mom gave him over the recent easter holiday, and thank goodness as now it was the only thing between the humongo vat of yogurt silvino and i just made and the odious perfume of dairy gone dangerous.

the threat of which was so great, it spawned operation FRIDGE-HO! housemate sam, silvino and i trekked to the ute-rental (ozzi for flat-bed truck), and then took a drive about 40 minutes north to a retirement community in the darien-connecticut-esque beach suburb of mona vale. this tiny, robust hungarian woman was selling all her appliances - she had a fridge that could harbour food for the masses, and was.

After 2 hours of dismantling screen doors and door knobs, she had a brand new oven for sale as well. untouched, the manual still in the top oven tray. sold. (in her front yard were 2 giant orchids about to bloom that she had snuck into the complex-tended landscaping, and a giant spider whose body was the size of a mouse. she was also sprouting mint, rose clippings and a transparent-tipped suculant.)

none of us had eaten more than a piece of toast, and after 6 hours of op F-HO the starving missionaries peeled into the uppercrust - a renowned pie shop on the route home (my mouth waters just typing the name). and gracias a dios the rain had stopped so our new whiteware didn't get washed away.

the new fridge really is larger than life and it consumed our weekend...

and now with all our food transferred (like filling the pacific ocean with 3 guppies) we are happily chillin once more.