Tuesday, June 14, 2011

proyecto

The living room functions as
dining room
movie theatre
library
art studio
party room
cockroach hangout (mostly in the couch)
gymnasium
laundry drying facility
museum of my red-wine-gone-awry
general storage
and most importantly ---
dance studio.

Silvino and I both dancers, me from Salsa he from Forró, are learning together Samba de Gafieira, a sensual partner dance to the Samba rhythm. Its closest relative is perhaps Argentine Tango.

We spend one night a week watching a couple youtube videos, pausing them at 10 second intervals and arguing about what the dancers are doing with their feet while their hands are doing whaaa? Play it again... No, no, no, I think it's like this...

The medley of carpets on the floor makes for frequent tripping, when we're not stepping on each other's socks or just falling down from awkward beginner's balance. It's probably the most we are ever at odds with each other, but despite the mini squirmishes (new word, i can't believe i'm saying this, but thank you Sarah Palin...) it's my favourite part of the week.

Here is a sampling from youtube...



Video of us in action... coming soon.

Saturday, June 4, 2011

Pierre fashion week

This boy was at the ferry terminal with us. And then again at the grocery store. And then again at the cove where we went snorkeling. Come on!

thank you silvino's shoulder for helping to orchestrate the fashion-shoots-he-scores!

can you believe it?
(p, there's a market out there... for reals!)

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

cockawhos?

3 cockatoos

2 cockatoos and 2 rainbow lorikeets

back to 3 cockatoos.

the sulfur crusted cockatoos are everywhere - the "pigeon" of sydney. they are about a foot and a half tall and have an amazing screech. at cockatoo-o-clock (dusk) it is impossible to converse if the bird-club has parked nearby.

ditto the lorikeets who park by the thousands in their routine trees.

Thursday, May 26, 2011

Vinnies vidi vici

In the US, we all wish Goodwill towards men, but here in Australia it's Vinnies. Which is short for St. Vincent de Paul. And if it's not Vinnies it's Salvos, which is typical Ozzification of any name - chop of first syllable and add "o", so from Salvation Army we get...

I had an amazing scouring/meditation session and resisted the temptation to buy a heap of unnecessary crapola, but could not resist sharing just a few items - POP QUIZ!

1.
Is it a crime that I did not purchase this for my brother? [y/n]
Does this t-shirt make you want to brb, rsvp or wtf?


2.
You make the call!

Is this clever because
a) the ice cream would be a mess if it were hot?
b) the wearer is "hot", as in good-looking, but they continually spill their food?
c) it's japanese-ish
d) there's a smiley face
e) both c & d


3.
a) We're so glad that Urinetown!
b) Urine for a treat because
c) Poopalopolis is just next door! (on a blouse!)
d) all of the above


4.
Is this capitalism gone...
a) apeshit
b) what does this have to do with capitalism?
c) GREAT!

Just got a cat - don't have a name?
Than this book's for you! We've got a whole list of names across a variety of cat-egories so you can create a name coutured to the uniqueness of your feline friend!
So come on down to What to Name the Cat and get your name TODAY!

Seriously, though. This book was actually full of cat-names by categories such as "striped fur", "curved tails", "calico colouring"...


5.
A series of cat-posed pictures with quotes about love and marriage.
Is this
a) a walloping waste of time
b) i'm too clever for my cat, too clever for my cat, too cleveeerrrr...
c) the most vital to life purchase anyone could ever make - at $9.99
d) the most vital to life purchase anyone could ever make - at <$0.50


6.
This was pretty PAWESOME -
it said so on the back!
Gentlemen, start your engines, and "May the cutest kitten win!"

Where was this maverick of pun-for-all family-pun spawned?
a) Qingdao
b) the moon
c) San Francisco!

Ok, so I did buy this last one.
I had to!

Answers:
1. y, wtf
2. e
3. d
4. c
5. a or d
6. c!

Monday, May 23, 2011

Missy Eliott Presents My Laundry


My laundry brings all the boys to the yard

And their like, It's better than yours

Damn right, it's better than yours

I can teach you...

But I have to charge! (ouch!)

---
Lala-lalala... the boys are waiting...
---

My laundry brings...


Saturday, May 21, 2011

New Friend!

After a dinner of roast lamb, beet, and sweet potato salad with butternut squash sage risotto -

[
Risotto, because I bought arborio rice 2 weeks ago for 750 grams at $2. And then the next week I saw "2 for $3" 1 kg bags of arborio rice - you do the math! (here in Australia they say "maths" which is the ultimate slap in the face to anyone with a speech impediment, not to mention straight up annoying.) And then my partner in crime, channeling pretty much all the men of my life (self-appointed 'voice of reasons') exactly: "But Lizzi... we already have arborio rice - and that other rice - at home."
"I know, but this is so much cheaper, and besides risotto is delicious!" Not such a good argument, because really I was just prey to good marketing. My meek rebuttal was followed by a the pronouncement:
"Risotto is just rice cooked badly."
So now I am on rice-crazed mission to prove that risotto is delicious, and furthermore that it was not only a good, but an excellent decision to purchase such an obscene amount of couture rice.
And after round one - mushroom and beet-green with parmasean skins - which was devoured... what do you think? "Well, the stuff around the rice was delicious."
(Everyone here sticks to their guns, we all die fighting... but it's manifest destiny, or destiny's child or meet your destiny that I'm going to win.)
]

(back to the story, and the menu:) and mulled red wine that I preceded to spill all over the house and my guests (not from inebriation but from lack of coordination) followed by chocolate chip coconut chopped date cookies (YUM! thank god they were so yum, erasing any memory of flying wine mugs and stained... everything) - I wished my Polish friends adieu at the front door and...

HELLO MR. LEAF-TAILED GECKO!

s/he hung out with me about the house for about 20 minutes.

I desperately searched the kitchen for cockroaches - which is like finding candy in a candy shop - when you turn on the light a whole lotta cockroaches scatter (and I say hold on fellas...), the floor and all the countertops positively wriggle themselves into shadows - or when you're popping toast in or grabbing a glass a cockroach might fall from the ceiling at which point I say, "Thanks for dropping in!"

I even thrust my hand into the rubbish bin where I knew there were cockroaches because I had thrown out my housemate's infested indian spices box (inFESTED, eggs, the mamas, the works). But when you really need a cockroach?!

oh come oooon!

Probably better I couldn't find one of our cherished domesticated variety, as it might have passed on some of the poison that we have strewn about in hopes to eliminate them. (That so far have proven merely a placebo... at least now our perception of the cockroach population has diminished.)

So back out on the front stoop, the Leaf-Tailed Gecko jumped to the wall and clung.

And in the morning we wake up to our housemate Sam, "Hey guys, there's a gecko in my room!" A different one, a slightly larger body, and smaller tail - from re-growth. (They can lose their tails exactly once and regenerate one, but after that them's the brakes) A beautiful species with a heavily textured back skin and black eyes with slim yellow iris slits, ear holes on the corners of the "diamond" width of its head, 5 fingers and 5 toes.

They make a loud chirping-screech that sounds like the prelude to a toddler's tantrum -
or the whimpering cry that precedes,

"Risotto! Again?!"

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

aaaa real monsters

beware! the sugar shark lurks in abandoned lots
luring its prey with derelict furniture


MUNCH MUNCH MUNCH MUNCH
I'M GONNA EAT YOU!